First Love
Thursday, 18 September 2008
With all the shaky economy and the falling of Lehmann Brothers, and with speculation of AIG to be the next to go, this week is surely an overwhelming week for many especially for those with funds in investments.
This morning has been a very special day as I was waiting upon the Lord and reflecting on the moments of conversation that has taken placed during the Tuesday afternoon moms’ session.
Lena’s continuous comment over the past weeks on WanWan’s love and hunger for God is so great, this was because she is a new believer and the kind of experience every new believer will have. As for her (Lena), is different now because she has experienced it and is done with. And with the many things she has seen and witnessed, it is difficult for her to come back to that place. The remarks she made about being there before, the drive and love for God when she was a new Christian will never be the same now, and that she could not have the same fire she used to, and doesn’t want it because of her gift of empathy, something to this extend, got me really thinking and praying for her.
First of all, I really do not know what had happened and experiences she had gone through while her walk with the Lord. It seems there were many unhappiness or misunderstandings or even 1 or 2 rotten eggs, etc that may caused her to think that we can not have back our First Love with the Lord or the fact that she doesn’t want it because she could not stop crying. Yes, there may be times of lull period in our walk with the Lord, but I believe we should not even doubt God’s sovereignty and his love for us.
Secondly, I strongly believe that this is a lie from the enemy. God is longing for us to love him and has worn us about the height from which we have fallen and must repent from it.
And thirdly, I see WanWan’s experiencing God is so real and full of joy and I asked God to restore it back into my life once again. I want what she has and more, not only just for me but for my fellow mommy friends too! As God promises, Ask and ye shall be given.
God showed me that Lena’s ‘First Love’ has been eroded away and He wants her to have it back. This leads me to the reading of Revelation 2:1-7 and I started weeping. My spirit could not stop weeping and started praying for her. I smsed her with tears rolling down my cheeks and told her about God wanting her back and be reminded of the First Love she used to have for Him. By faith, I messaged her.
I went on checking on my email thereafter and continued with my e-daily bread, and there it stood for the second time, in the Suggested prayer for the day, "Dear God, in the words of the song writer: 'Oh Lord please light the fire, That once burned bright and clear, Replace the lamp of my first love, That burned with holy fear.' Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully in Jesus' name, amen”. I was astonished and WOWed! I asked the Lord what is this about of the First Love he is revealing, not only once but twice?
The day before, I attended a meeting with the SCGS moms’ prayer group and there were two visiting guests in town. Luci, who addressed us and said something about Albert Einstein, was expelled from school at an early stage because he was not able to catch up with his lessons. And what Einstein said later in life was that he was a slower learner and it is not because he is incapable. I immediately thought of Xandra and I told myself to research on Einstein’s early childhood.
So, after my e-daily bread, I researched for Einstein’s childhood. For the third time, God showed me the word “First Love”, even though this first love was for Einstein’s first love in science, I knew God led me there for a purpose and it is not by coincidence that He reveals the word “First Love” 3 times in one morning just within a short span of time (less than 1 hour). I knew this was really serious.
God shows me that the First Love message was not only for Lena but for all whom I am worshiping the Lord and doing BS with. For older Christians who are tired & weary, God wants to set the fire in them again. I cried. I thank the Lord and I told the Lord that yes, please restore back that First Love we have for him once again. Not only to restore the zeal and fire in me, but for all my sisters in Christ, whom I have been fellowshipping with, weeks after weeks. I sent another message with tears welling up again to Jean, Nina, Phoebe, Xandra, Charlotte, Yolande, and Lena again.
The day went by with daily chores and driving Gayle to and back from her enrichment classes. That evening, I spent a wonderful night out with my siblings at a UBS function at the Command House. After I got home, I did some reading from my BS book ‘A purpose Driven Life’ on Day 12. And for the forth time in a day, God reminded me of his ‘First Love’! It talks about Rev 2:1-7 again on how we may have been passionate in the past and have lost that desire. That was the same problems of the Christians in Ephesus, they have left their first love. Now, I know that I am supposed to share this to as many tired Christians and even to my siblings and church mates who are all walking in the Lord fervently but may have lost their first love.
It was really a very interesting day of practicing God’s presence. Thank you Lord. May your will be done in me and my family. Restore in us your first love. Fill us, Lord. Fire us up. Blessed be the name of the Lord!